who are

Who Are Your Friends?

are they the ones who stick up for you?
who fight for you?
who defend you to the bitter end?

what do you demand of a friendship?

unfailing loyalty?

pure devotion?

my friends are the people i choose to let
into my heart. the ones whose cries i can
hear in my sleep, whom i hold in my thoughts.

you'll laugh, but sometimes my friends don't
know they're my friends. they're people who've
said nothing to me, but in watching them interact
with other people, i say, "i will get to know you
better. i will trust you." and then i try to slowly
approach--a word here, a hug there. a quick
reply, if i'm able, to an email.

i've made many friends that way.

i want for my friends what i want for me:

room to grow. room to be different. room to
let me make my own choices and my own decisions,
and respect for those things. room to make mistakes.

i don't want them to fight for me. i don't want unfailing
loyalty, because when i screw up, who will tell me the
truth? who will say to me, "you're too close, please
step back and take a deep breath."

i don't want pure devotion, either. i have no right to
ask that of anyone.

i am so blessed by the friends i have both here and in
my offline life.

friends are the family we choose for ourselves.